Hello Aspies,
I know I have talked about love, and loss but this thing I want to talk about Loss in general.
There are two types of loss we deal with, one is a death, someone we loved or who has touched out lives and left a whole in it, the other is when we endure a break-up and we we are deal with the breakup. Either way it’s a tough thing to deal with.
I myself have dealt with loss in my family, I have lost my father, cousins, and close family friends. Know we all deal with loss in so many different ways. I know as aspies its hard to figure out what to do, because our mind doesn’t process information like most so I am going to give you some sound advice.
One the first things people will try to tell you, is to move on from it. What people don’t realize we all mourn in different times, yes time does heal our wounds, but that wound is still there. A break up or loss of a loved one is something hard to just come over. Take your time, mediate and look back at your own life and realize that life is precious and enjoy while you still have it.
Another thing people will tell you if they are cold hearted is to suck it up or be strong. You have the right to tell these people to bugger off, this you time to grieve the why you want to. Yes you need to be strong but not when you heart is shattered from shock.
Some things you can to do help you get through these hard times are:
- Seek out a friend and talk to to them.
- Find some alone time and meditate to help clear you mind
- Keep yourself busy so you don’t dwell on things (This is good, because it will help fight off depression)
- If you have a pet cuddle with them. Pets are know to sense emotions from us. They can give you that unconditional love and support you need.
- Talk to a family member
- Try to do things that help you remember the good times. in both loss or breakup.
Life is very fragile, you try as you might to not cause any waves but something always happens. You make promises, you try to be that good son or daughter, but something always pops up. DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF. God works in mysterious ways. Either the relationship wasn’t meant to be or it was their time to go.
Lastly I leave you with this poem.
“The people you have in your life grow and occupy space in the tapestry that makes up your life. When they are gone, it makes a hole where they used to be. The memories and love are still there and may always be there. So don’t look at your tapestry as filled with holes- look at it as your own unique lace pattern. The pattern isn’t over, but it is constantly changing. The pain of loss doesn’t ever really go away, but it does lessen over time.”
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